Communication · couples
The same argument, in a slightly different outfit.
Couples therapy for recurring conflict and communication breakdown, across Maryland by secure video.
Most couples who describe a communication problem can communicate perfectly well. What they cannot do is get through one specific conversation without it turning into the argument they have already had forty times.
The content changes. The structure does not. The work is on the structure.
What is actually happening
Recurring conflict usually runs on a small number of moves: criticism that lands as character rather than behaviour, defensiveness that answers a charge nobody made, contempt that ends the discussion, and withdrawal that reads as abandonment to the other person.
These are identifiable and, once named, visible in real time. Most couples can spot their own within two or three sessions.
Repair, not victory
What distinguishes durable partnerships is not the absence of conflict but the ability to repair afterwards, quickly and without a formal negotiation.
A large part of the work is learning what a repair attempt from your partner actually looks like, since they are frequently made and just as frequently missed.
A few markers before you get in touch.
Underneath the pattern
Each partner brings expectations formed long before the relationship about what conflict means and what happens next. Schema therapy is used to look at these, because they explain why a small disagreement can produce a disproportionate response.
Understanding first, then decisions. Techniques applied without that understanding tend not to survive the first real fight.
The practical frame
Couples sessions are 75 minutes at $280, by secure video, with both partners physically in Maryland. Individual sessions are $180 for 53 to 60 minutes.
Enquiries are answered within 24 to 48 hours. Sessions are available in English or French.
Is this a fit?
Is this the right fit?
A few markers before you get in touch.
You'll likely get the most from this work if you are:
- Couples across Maryland stuck in a repeating conflict
- Partners where one withdraws and the other pursues
- Couples who want tools they will still use in six months
The work asks for:
- Both partners attending
- A willingness to look at your own moves first
- Practice between sessions
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